In Israel the Polish character (especialy that of the Polish mother, AKA "Jewish mother" in US) is a popular topic for jokes, although it's not so funny.
Irit Kleiner-Paz is an Israeli psychologist who wrote an interesting essay about this phenomenon. I will soon translate it for you. If you ask for it, it will motivate me.

Links and recommendations

  • The Book of Intimate Grammar (1991)
    Is a beautiful story about a child and his Polish mother, whose behavior is
    described in an exact (and for us Poles) familiar manner.
  • This is a virtual Jewish mother if you need some moral support at work :-)


(also from

Three Jewish mothers are sitting on a bench in Brent Cross shopping centre talking about (what else?) how much their sons love them.
Sadie says "You know the Chagall painting hanging in my living room?
My son, Arnold, bought that for me for my 75th birthday. What a good boy he is and how much he loves his mother."
Minnie says,"You call that love? You know the Mercedes I just got for Mother's Day? That's from my son Bernie. What a doll."
Shirley says "That's nothing. You know my son Stanley? He's in analysis with a psychoanalyst in Harley Street, five sessions a week.
And what does he talk about? Me."

What's the difference between a Jewish mother and a Rottweiler?
The Rottweiler leaves the child alone at the end.

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he's been
given a part in the school play. "Wonderful! What part is it?" replies his
The boy says, "I play the part of the Jewish husband." The mother
scowls "That's terrible. Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking

What does a Polish woman says when she comes?
"Beige! We'll paint the ceiling beige!

Two Polish women meet on the street.
"Where have you been?"
"In a beauty parlour."
"That as I can see, was closed."

Moishe: Hallo, mom, how are you?
Mom: Very well, thanks!
Moishe: Oh, sorry, I must have dialed the wrong number!

A French Jewish man rings at home after being away from his parents for 5 years.
Daniel -Hallo mum, it's me Daniel. I am Coming back home. Do you still have some room for me?
Mum - Oh Daniel, don't worry we still have your bedroom.
Daniel - Mum, actually I got married, but she is not Jewish.
Mum - Ah Daniel, she must be very good if she is not Jewish.
Daniel- Mum, actually she is a black American woman and we have also one kid. Do you still have a place for us?
Mum - Don't worry the kid is taking your bedroom, you and your wife will take our bedroom and dad will sleep on the sofa.
Daniel - Mum, and you? Where you will be sleeping?
Mum - Don't worry about me, as I hang up I will die.

An old Jewish woman is standing by the riverbank..
She shouts out: "Help, help"...
A passer-by says: "What's the problem?"
She explains: "My son.....the drowning"...

A Jewish mother sends her son a red sweater and a blue sweater for Channukkah.
He is soon going to visit her but can't figure out which sweater to wear. Having become completely stressed, he finally chooses the blue sweater, puts in on, and heads for his mother's house.
She opens the door and instead of making sure he arrived alright, simply asks him,
"What, you didn't like the red sweater?"

A young Jewish man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry."
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.
He then says, "Okay, Ma, guess which one I'm going to marry."
She immediately replies, "The one on the right."
"That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?
The Jewish mother replies, "I didn't like her."

A man calls his mother in Israel: "Mom, how are you?"
"Not too good," says the mother. "I've been very weak."
The son says, "Why are you so weak?"
She says, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."
The son says, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?"
The mother answers, "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."

Nadine, Joyce, and Sylvia are sitting on a park bench, talking about their children.
Slyvia: Well friends, I have good news and bad news.
Nadine: Nu?
Slyvia: My Michael called me up on the phone last night and told me he was gay.
Joyce: Oy, Slyvia, vey iz mir! And after all you did for him! You were such a wonderful mother. Don't blame yourself.
Nadine: Of course she was wonderful! So, nu? That's the bad news. Let's hear the good news?
Slyvia: Well ... he's marrying a doctor!








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